so, the girl is down at myrtle beach for a week, and even though i just talked to her for an hour plus, it just doesn’t feel like enough. god, i’m a dork.
excitement rattles through my bones, with a pinch of trepidation and anxiety – the days of routine and certainty feel blissfully distant, but i should be careful not to mistake this new awareness with something that itself will become habitual. one must not get lulled into complacency, a very wise fellow once told me, and i will be careful to listen to those words.
there is an open space waiting to be consumed, which is a good thing; trying to decide what to fill it with, especially when you are used to it being so cluttered, is what is proving to be difficult. i’ve contemplated inflating it with strains of motivation and self perpetuating garbage, but it doesn’t feel right yet, but i’m also concerned that with hesitation it might become gorged with intentions that aren’t quite as noble. grrr, the vicious circle, the self-fulfilling prophecy, always nipping at my heels.
at this moment however, with echoes of technicolor yawns and vanilla smelling necks, i welcome morpheus into my mind and hope that the journeys he leads me on will be wondrous and insightful, leaving my wide eyed, in awe and in peace.