a beautiful someone

i woke up in a strange house, resting under the sheets next to a beautiful someone who felt as lonely as i did.  she fluttered a smile and said “good morning, want some breakfast?”.  i lied and told her i was fine.  mentally preparing myself for the onslaught of a lazy day, i wrestled out of comfort and fashioned myself in appropriate attire. holding vice in hand i excused myself while my stomach twisted and wrenched in abashment.

i felt guilty and i missed her.  for no reason whatsoever.  she’s not even here.  she doesn’t belong to me.  not in the way we clandestinely wanted. to think, after so long, it would still be there.  maybe it’ll never go away.

my throat and head cleared in unison and i chuckled in a sad and desperate way, with the smell of bacon and eggs underlined with a subtle touch of cigarettes in the background.  i stared at the makings of a future pool, or so she told me the night before as we wove in and out of philosophical nonsense, and i couldn’t help but think of proscribed reciprocal infatuation. “cheers to that” i thought, and immediately forced myself to forget with the help of mr. maker’s mark, if only for a short while.

her breakfast was ready despite my objections, so i ate next to a beautiful someone, while we both pondered on someone else.

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